At ease, disease.

When my friends first took me to Decorah, we stopped at a park overlooking Eldorado, Iowa. It sits at the edge of where the land drops off precipitously and begins to be hilly and more wooded. This is an are of Iowa not touched by glaciers, apparently. I stopped and took this photo of the small town in the distance and what lies beyond. When I was younger, it used to be a more spectacular view, but the parks folk have let some trees grow up and the vista isn't as wide as it used to be. Of course, it could be age. The world does not always seem as limitless as it used to. My son woke up this morning brimming with optimism and excitement for the day, what's on t.v., and whatever else he is encountering. It's almost overwhelming.


On the other hand, it's a crisp day, and we're going to Iowa City to watch a basketball game we didn't pay for. The house is warm and almost clean, my wife hasn't left me yet, and the dog has all his shots. I no longer spend lots of time thinking of the limitless possibilities of who I'll be. I spend more time pondering how to cope with who I am. That's not good or bad -- just inevitable, I think.


I interviewed a 13 year old girl on Monday who offered to knock her mother's teeth out in the lobby. She meant it. She was sexually abused at the age of 5 or 7. She is not sure which age.


Her ex-boyfriend recently beat her up. She has bruises on her arms and probably elsewhere to prove it. She was at a house with older kids who like to drink and snort ground up pharmaceuticals. She's sexually active and has unprotected sex and didn't go to school last week because she has a venereal infection of some sort. Until recently she was able to blackmail her mother because her step-father is an addict and she finds needles in the home. One time recently she walked in on her stepfather in the bathroom, shooting up. Step-dad is in jail now and has to stay clean for the time being so the jig is up.


I signed her commitment papers on Thursday. I go to her hearing on Monday. She told me all this stuff during our first meeting, and clearly wants to begin to deal with things, but has so far refused to change. Change must seem pretty overwhelming to a 13 year old girl in these circumstances. Her mother knows. Mom used to be a hooker and has a similar history.


This kid is pretty, in a tough, bruised sort of way. She has a good deal of insight, which is rare for a 13 year old in a lot of cases, and certainly rare for a person who has experienced the degree of trauma inferred by her history. She may make it. I know I did my job and blew the whistle, as I have done dozens of time before.

My Dad, a former Marine, used to lean back and sigh and say: "At ease, disease. There's fungus among us."


My son, a future character, keeps asking my why I always take pictures of flowers and landscapes.


I get enough action at work.